happy days.

"You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing." –Unknown

Cheers.

My Pooey. I love her so. :)

This dog is the most amazing creature in the world.


(An article about why we love our dogs.)

"My friend and fellow dog lover Edie, an occupational therapist in Massachusetts, has been looking for a mate for nearly 10 years. She finally thought she'd found one in Jeff, a nice guy, generous and funny, who teaches high school. They dated for several months, and just as there was talk about a future, it occurred to Edie that Jeff hadn't really bonded with her yellow Lab, Sophie. In fact, as she thought more about it, she wasn't sure Jeff was a dog guy at all.
She confronted him about this at dinner one night, and he confessed, in some anguish, that he didn't love Sophie, didn't love dogs in general, never had.
They broke up the next week. More accurately, she dumped him. "What can I say?" Edie told me, somewhat defensively. "Sophie has been there for me, day in and day out, for years. I can't say the same of men. She's my girl, my baby. Sooner or later, it would have ended.

Having just spent two months on a book tour talking to dog lovers across the country, I can testify that this story isn't unusual. The lesson Edie gleaned, she says, was that she should have asked about Sophie first, not last.
In America, we love our dogs. A lot. So much that we rarely wonder why anymore.
This, perhaps, is why God created academics.
John Archer, a psychologist at the University of Central Lancashire, has been puzzling for some time over why people love their pets. In evolutionary terms, love for dogs and other pets "poses a problem," he writes. Being attached to animals is not, strictly speaking, necessary for human health and welfare. True, studies show that people with pets live a bit longer and have better blood pressure than benighted nonowners, but in the literal sense, we don't really need all those dogs and cats to survive.
Archer's alternative Darwinian theory: Pets manipulate the same instincts and responses that have evolved to facilitate human relationships, "primarily (but not exclusively) those between parent and child."
No wonder Edie ditched Jeff. She was about to marry the evil stepfather, somebody who wasn't crazy about her true child.
Or, to look at it from the opposite direction, Archer suggests, "consider the possibility that pets are, in evolutionary terms, manipulating human responses, that they are the equivalent of social parasites." Social parasites inject themselves into the social systems of other species and thrive there. Dogs are masters at that. They show a range of emotions—love, anxiety, curiosity—and thus trick us into thinking they possess the full range of human feelings.
They dance with joy when we come home, put their heads on our knees and stare longingly into our eyes. Ah, we think, at last, the love and loyalty we so richly deserve and so rarely receive. Over thousands of years of living with humans, dogs have become wily and transfixing sidekicks with the particularly appealing characteristic of being unable to speak. We are therefore free to fill in the blanks with what we need to hear. (What the dog may really be telling us, much of the time, is, "Feed me.")
As Archer dryly puts it, "Continuing features of the interaction with the pet prove satisfying for the owner."
It's a good deal for the pets, too, since we respond by spending lavishly on organic treats and high-quality health care.
Psychologist Brian Hare of Harvard has also studied the human-animal bond and reports that dogs are astonishingly skilled at reading humans' patterns of social behavior, especially behaviors related to food and care. They figure out our moods and what makes us happy, what moves us. Then they act accordingly, and we tell ourselves that they're crazy about us.
"It appears that dogs have evolved specialized skills for reading human social and communicative behavior," Hare concludes, which is why dogs live so much better than moles.
These are interesting theories. Raccoons and squirrels don't show recognizable human emotions, nor do they trigger our nurturing ("She's my baby") impulses. So, they don't (usually) move into our houses, get their photos taken with Santa, or even get names. Thousands of rescue workers aren't standing by to move them lovingly from one home to another.
If the dog's love is just an evolutionary trick, does that diminish it? I don't think so. Dogs have figured out how to insinuate themselves into human society in ways that benefit us both. We get affection and attention. They get the same, plus food, shelter, and protection. To grasp this exchange doesn't trivialize our love, it explains it.
I'm enveloped by dog love, myself. Izzy, a border collie who spent the first four years of his life running along a small square of fencing on a nearby farm, is lying under my desk at the moment, his head resting on my boot.
Rose, my working dog, is curled into a tight ball in the crate to my left. Emma, the newcomer who spent six years inside the same fence as Izzy, prefers the newly re-upholstered antique chair. Plagued with health problems, she likes to be near the wood stove in the winter.
When I stir to make tea, answer the door, or stretch my legs, all three dogs move with me. I see them peering out from behind the kitchen table or pantry door, awaiting instructions, as border collies do. If I return to the computer, they resume their previous positions, with stealth and agility. If I analyzed it coldly, I would admit that they're probably alert to see if an outdoor romp is in the offing, or some sheepherding, or some beef jerky. But I'd rather think they can't bear to let me out of their sight."

Me too. :)

cut me down.

maybe he's my mr.big. carrie and i are quite bit alike.

it doesn't seem right to have someone who has hurt me and isn't good for me creep into my thoughts. i am not the type of girl to let people treat me poorly, hell i could have very possibly just ruined a friendship over it. for some reason, he has some sort of hold over me. just like big did with carrie.

i made a grand gesture and he reciprocated. i think i will just leave it at that. i have gotten what i needed, i feel more at peace. i just catch myself leaping to the future and thinking, "well maybe again someday." i think i'm going to leave it be. i'm ready to tuck this experience safely into the very bottom of my heart and start fresh. that's why i came here, a fresh start.

speaking of starting fresh, my fresh start is already beggining to turn a bit sour. i think jake is really upset with me. i was in the right, he had no right to be the way he was, he was out of line. i am being the bigger person, i called him. the ball is in his court. if he doesn't call, then he wasn't my friend to begin with. once i'm friends with someone, i'm friends for life. i don't intend on throwing that aside because of a stupid arguement, but i'm not also going to let someone sit there and hurt my feelings.

and maybe he was right, maybe i am being ridiculous, but i feel more alone now then i ever have in my entire life. lindsey and i have virtually no friendship left. my dad is getting worse. he swears he isn't doing that shit anymore, but i'm not sure i believe him. he and heike's marriage is falling apart. he's falling apart. i know he will get better though, it's just a setback. he'll be fine.

i know things will be okay. i am an incredibly strong person and i've seen and dealt with enough in 20, almost 21 years, that i know anything that god decides to throw at me i can handle. i'm not worried about that. sometimes i just get tired. i am really truly happy though, i'm just a little dark and twisty, but happy. i have blessed with so much and i need to remember that. besides, i can't let people down, i'm the bright and shiny light. people need me to be happy, i need them to need me. that's what i was put on this earth for, to make others smile.

so tomorrow i will wake up, put on my makeup, and face the day with a smile on my face. it's all i can do. i can't dwell on my problems, i could have it so much worse. besides, i do like it here.

sometimes i just wish i had someone lay my head on and tell me it's all going to be okay, because even though i know deep down it will be, sometimes it's nice to hear it come out of someone else's mouth.

side affects they don't advertise.

I just read a little bit of a blog dedicated to the television show "Coach". I don't know why I think this is odd, maybe I should start a blog dedicated to "Different Strokes". One summer I watched that show every night on Nick at Night, I would always sing a long to the theme song. Shows what a life I had. haha.

Currently I have a headache and am frustrated with a few things.

(1) I am working on an assigment that really shouldn't be that hard, but I have somehow managed to make it difficult. It's just a reading reflection on two chapters and a reading. No big deal right? Well I am stressed out because I volunteered to be our disscussion group leader first and I feel the need to really sound smart..or something. I just need to come up with six questions based on Bloom's Taxonomy and I'm having problems. Maybe I'm just trying to hard. I'm a frustrated none the less. I feel like the dumbest person in the world sometimes.

(2) My friend Jake. He really made me angry tonight. It's really just been building up, tonight just made me recognize the fact that he is upsetting me. Okay whatever, we kissed. Big deal. I just need to figure things out, which I did. I am not interested in him in that way, I really enjoy being his friend and that' strictly all. It just seems like ever since he realized that our friendship wasn't going in a romantic direction he has stopped wanting to hang with me. Oh wait, he calls me everyday so we can study in the library. Whatever happened to going to Powell's, watching movies, and playing the Wii? No more fun stuff. Just studying. On top of that, he go kind of cross with me tonight. I was telling him how someone had hurt my feelings, and he just said "Welcome to reality, I'm tired of listening to you complain." KEEP IN MIND....that I have sat and listened to him talk, and talk, and talk, about his ex girlfriend and his relationship with his parents. I don't mind doing that, in fact I enjoy it. I like being there for people, but damn it, when I just want a little bit of "yeah, they were mean", he can't give me that! I don't even complain about much either, I am always miss happy go lucky, the only place I really complain and get all dramatic and depressed is this blog! It's my outlet and nobody I know reads it so I can say anything I want.

It just upsets me that as soon as he figured out we weren't going to date he got wierd. He needs to get over that, that has been happening to me for years, I'm the "friend" girl. Deal with it. Hmmpth.

(3) The fact that I am not sleeping well, and haven't been since I moved. I miss my bed at home. That bed is the most comfortable bed in the world, and I dare some one to tell me different.

(4) Valentine's Day. It's not because I don't have a boyfriend, because I never have. I don't see it as a holiday just for people in looooove. I see it as a holiday in which you spend time with the people you love. I'm just sad because this year I won't have my family or my best friends either. I'm just a little sad that I really will be sitting alone and watching a movie. It could be worse, I need to remember that.

(5) My puncuation grammer seems to be getting worse. I don't think it's my imagination either. I need to go back to the basics. I need to read more for fun, I just get so burnt out on reading about weather and climate change.

(6) I need a job and I'm not trying very hard to get one. I can see this being a very awful thing. Tomorrow, I am forcing myself. I miss working.

I think I'm going to Powell's and get some books. I love that place. Last time I was there, there was this dream boat of a boy at the table across from me, we had a movie moment...actually I probably imagined that, I have a wild imagination sometimes. A very wild one.

Two burning questions.

(1) If a person gets a mullet and the party is in the back, wouldn't they have to walk backwards all the time, because that's where the party's at? Just an observation.

(2) I wonder if the Boxcar Children ate s'mores. I hope for Benny's sake they did.

It's roughly 12:15 am and I need to get up in 6 hours and 45 minutes.

Even though Conor Oberst seems a bit depressed, I bet we'd be friends.